Never miss

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

~Will Rogers

The quickest way

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.

~Will Rogers

When you give a lesson

When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.

~Will Rogers

There's two

There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.

~Will Rogers

After eating

After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

~Will Rogers

If you get to thinkin'

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

~Will Rogers

If you're ridin' ahead

If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

~Will Rogers

Lettin' the cat

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back in.

~Will Rogers

Good judgment

Good judgment comes from experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

~Will Rogers

Don't squat

Don't squat with your spurs on.

~Will Rogers

You've got to

You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.

~Will Rogers

Half our life

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

~Will Rogers